Char’s Fitness Weblog

I am concerned about how fat I’m feeling. It’s not just in my head either. My clothes are tight, I’m uncomfortable, I’m lethargic, quietly sad. All the signs are there. I’m packing on the weight and not treating myself well. Ironically I think about my weight, my fitness, food and exercise all the time. I’m just not doing anything about it, other than over-eating, wearing the same outfits ad nauseum, feeling dumpy.

I’m putting a lot of stock in turning things around after my trip. No more excuses. I’ll have my new membership at the gym a few blocks from Dave’s and I’ll need a serious overhaul in how I eat. All these food court lunches and overeating evenings are seriously depressing me.

So I overate at lunch and have been feeling bloated ever since. Of course I still maganed to eat a sugar cookie for a snack a few hours later and still feel so full.

What is it about this feeling that brings me back here time and again? It’s familiar and sad and so cumbersome. And I feel the happy fit lively girl in me getting quieter and sadder. I need to shake off these blues, these pounds and these tired clothes!

Saturday

Track. Yes.

Exercise at least four times. Yes, walked.

Grocery shop and plan meals for the week. Not today.

Eat healthy dinners at home at least 5 times this week. Not today. Ate at home but that’s a technicality. We ate Kidd Valley.

Keep blogging & connecting with myself. Yes.

My goals were:

Track. I tracked 5 times this week.

Exercise at least four times. I stretched and or walked 6 days this week. 

Grocery shop and plan meals for the week. Yes, and it has felt great.

Eat healthy dinners at home at least 5 times this week. Ate at home 4 times. 

Keep blogging & connecting with myself. Yes, 6 days this week!

What are next week’s goals?

Track.

Exercise at least four times.

Grocery shop and plan meals for the week.

Eat healthy dinners at home at least 5 times this week.

Keep blogging & connecting with myself.

My goals for March:

Continue running training.  Not met.

I haven’t gotten back into my routine. Worse, I’ve totally dropped out of it. I have continued to stretch and I have continued to walk rbut not as consistently or for as long as I was. I’ve felt challenged by the weather (cold and dark and uninspiring), challenged by the new gym situation (no lockers available so I have to carry a big heavy bag around with me all day), parking closer to the gym (much more than far from the gym, but when I work out every minute counts in order to get to work on time), and my own demons. I’ve quit All Star gym (effective the end of April) and am joining the Kenmore Fitness Center full time (effective the beginning of May). I’m convinced that this will be a much better, more convenient way to go.     

Stretched for 10 hours 32 minutes     

Walked for 8 hours (wow!)

Ran for 2 hours 45 minutes   

I exercised for a total of 21 hours 17 minutes averaging 41 minutes a day! 

I walked 20.54 miles and I ran 13.52 miles.  

Track what I eat.  Done!

I skipped about 10 days in March so 1/3 of the time I did not track. I am learning to use it more of a tool than just a to-do list. Trying to make sure I eat less than I burn. It is giving me some guidance to that end and more awareness.  

Lose two pounds. Not met.

Didn’t weigh myself today to verify but my weight gain has stopped. I’m hovering around 180. Now I can begin climbing down from that number.

Again I’m grateful that I did better than I thought. I’m grateful that I’m healthy. I’m grateful that I am clear about what I want. And I am beginning to feel closer to pursuing it. Getting my head on straight. And I’m grateful that I’m still here, blogging and working it out. 

Friday

Tracking - yes

Exercise at least four times - stretched & walked

Grocery shop and plan meals for the week - done

Eat healthy dinners at home - yes. Gumbo & fry bread. 

Keep blogging & connecting with myself - not

Thursday

Tracking - yes

Exercise at least four times - stretched & walked

Grocery shop and plan meals for the week - done

Eat healthy dinners at home - yes. Fish & a salad. Yum!

Keep blogging & connecting with myself - yes

Wednesday

Tracking - yes

Exercise at least four times - walked

Grocery shop and plan meals for the week - done

Eat healthy dinners at home - not today. At my suggestion we went out for Pho. I had the small chicken bowl. Healthy choice.

Keep blogging & connecting with myself - yes

Tuesday

Tracking - yes

Exercise at least four times - stretched & walked

Grocery shop and plan meals for the week - done

Eat healthy dinners at home - not today: dinner with Valria at Serious Pie. YUM.

Keep blogging & connecting with myself - yes. Also read an article in an old holiday issue of Weight Watchers magazine. It had the recipe for healthy living to stay on track the day  before a big event, the day of the event, the day after the event. I read the schedules of how we should organize our days and felt so inspired. I’ve lived like that before, no big event necessary, and know how GREAT it feels. I feel myself slipping into the groove. The healthy, motivated groove. 

Monday

Tracking - yes

Exercise at least four times - stretched & walked a mile

Grocery shop and plan meals for the week - done

Eat healthy dinners at home - yes: pork pull sandwich, grilled onions, fresh tomatoes

Keep blogging & connecting with myself - yes 

Sunday

Tracking - not today

Exercise at least four times - stretched

Grocery shop and plan meals for the week - yes!!

Eat healthy dinners at home - yes! chicken breast, broccoli, potato, tomato, fry bread

Keep blogging & connecting with myself - not today

Saturday

Tracking - not today

Exercise at least four times - not today, but did walk around for about five hours, shopping

Grocery shop and plan meals for the week - not today

Eat healthy dinners at home - not today (delicious Indian feast instead: Everest Kitchen)

Keep blogging & connecting with myself - yes

Last week’s goals were to continue reeling-in my eating habits and become more aware of my sabotaging behaviors, track what I eat, walk, stretch, or run at least four times and blog before binging.  I wanted to lose two pounds.

I did ok with eating. One or two days of over-eating. Especially yesterday. I know I’m eating out of frustration. I am not connected with myself, I’m not putting forward my best effort. I’m letting myself twist in the wind instead of taking charge. Letting myself go. Literally.

I did spend time blogging and exploring my issues. I did track every day, every bite. That’s really good. 

I did stretch and walk four times this week.

I didn’t blog before over eating yesterday. I was tired and hungry and felt captive to the situation. Because I didn’t have groceries at home and I don’t feel like I have access to Dave’s kitchen as freely as I would like. Because I don’t know what he will want to eat so I put off making plans and then, at the end of the day, at the end of  a work week, I’m too tired to go to the store, to think about shopping, prepping, cooking. Negotiating access to the kitchen with Dave’s brother who lives with us, along with his girlfriend. I just wanted to go out for Mexican food and eat chips and cheesy enchiladas, and sit back, zone out, and be served… It didn’t feel good either. Sitting in the booth with my jeans feeling too tight, my stomach spilling over them, eating too much… not a good formula…

I didn’t lose two pounds. Or two ounces. I haven’t weighted myself yet, but don’t need to. I didn’t eat less than I burned.

It was a successful week though as far as connecting with myself, following through with tracking and working on self awareness most of the time. 

What are next week’s goals?

Track.

Exercise at least four times.

Grocery shop and plan meals for the week.

Eat healthy dinners at home at least 5 times this week.

Keep blogging.

Keep connecting with myself.

Ate 20,016 calories, averaging 2,860 calories per day.

Burned  18,823, averaging 2,689 calories per day. 

I’m eating 171 calories more than I’m burning each day which equals gaining over 17 lbs in a year.

It’s simple math. 

*sigh*

Ate 3578 (that’s right)

Burned 2550 

Ate 2662

Burned 2745

Stretch 30 minutes

Walk 60 minutes